The Conclusion Ending Finale Conclusion

In which I reveal that I am a much more articulate writer than I am a speaker. Please excuse some bad splicing and alien yellowness.




Edited the goddamn thing to death and I still ended up having to split it in half. Some final notes I wanted to add:

• Language: the entirety of Twilight is written with the tone of a self-important teenager who thinks she is much smarter than she actually is, studying SAT words and using them poorly. I guess that could be the point, though it's obvious that Meyer herself thinks that Bella is much smarter than she actually is.
• Not all fans defend Bella. Some, in fact, seem to denote their particular attachment to Edward and their hatred of Bella for having him. Others dislike her for more reasonable reasons, like the fact that she's a little shit to people 90% of the time. Comments on ask.com revealed some fans recognizing her as a poor role model, though they still find her entertaining as a character. I'd like to find out what percentage of fans think that.
  
• Correction: Rosalie is not the only character that actively dislikes Bella. Lauren is "jealous" of her too. Oh, you don't remember Lauren? Don't worry. She's not important. Just like Rosalie. :'(
• Notice, I didn't mention sparkling in my video! Honestly, I forgot that Edward sparkles. That's how important the sparkleskin is to Twilight's plot.
  
• I'm sure there are plenty of people who like Twilight ironically. As in, they like it because it's misogynistic and terrible, and taking morbid enjoyment in misogyny is all the rage nowadays it seems. For reasons that I can't adequately explain, I find this actually more ridiculous than liking Twilight genuinely.

Lastly, my friend Zac, from over at Zac Rates the Universe, has given me the go-ahead to do a guest review of Twilight for his far more sophisticated review blog. So keep an eye out for that if you can't get enough Twisnarking.

Thanks all and best wishes!
Jenchilla